Ignoring parents' food choices

The other day I was doing some shopping in a big construction store, Home Depot-style. By the cashier I was a witness to a very peculiar and, in my view, very telling situation. There was a couple after me with a baby in a stroller. The cashier asked them "Does your baby eat lollipops already?" After they said that no, (the baby was like 6mo old!) they went on saying how much her older brother loves lollipops, so they took one. What did in this situation rub me the wrong way? There was no question "Would you like a lollipop for your child?", no there was no will of a parent taken into consideration. It was assumed, that the children eat lollipops and only the age of a child was questioned. I am assuming if the child was a toddler the woman would pass on the candy straight into the child's hands, without asking the parents for permission. Parents who do not agree to give children candies, junk food and general sweets are weird, stuck up, full of themselves and generally ridiculous.

In a similar situation was my friend some time ago. She's a mother to a 4 yo and she tries to feed the child in a healthy way. When she was out with him one day, her adult neighbor started to share potato chips with him. My friend politely opposed and asked her neighbor to not give anything to her son. The response? "Oh, come on, don't be ridiculous".

There are many situations of that kind, where parents' food choices are trampled over and seen as overreacting. I've heard many times comments of that kind even when the parents said the child had an allergy. "Just a little bit won't harm anyone". Parents who "deny" children sweets (or snacks) are seen as over-zealous crazies, who should be made fun of. I know that often it's especially difficult when it's the grandparents who can't understand and/or respect their children' choices in raising up grandchildren.

The same friend told me also that once, when she was at a family wedding someone was feeding her son with sugar cubes. o_0. What adult in a more or less sane mind would do such a thing?
Food is a very delicate issue, I know that when I have a baby I will face it as well, as I am a believer in a palo-style of eating, so no sweets or processed foods whatsoever, not even "healthy" snacks, granola bars or juices.

I can't stand how people can't respect parents' well thought-out choices concerning their children. I wish they spend all the energy of sticking their noses where they don't belong into reacting and acting when a child is really in danger, in a toxic environment, being abused and hurt. But no... to this people are blind, but have no issue calling sweets-ban a child-abuse.

Sanity! In government! About health and body size!

I know, crazy, right? I am glad I was linked to this short video.



Finally! Emphasis on health instead of size is the right way to go. I hope the "positive conversation" will begin soon. We need to finish with the obsession with obesity which leads to crazy fed diets, unhealthy risky food choices, pointing fingers and judging big people, stereotyping them as lazy with no will power or bring it all on themselves for some clandestine cheeseburger sessions.

this and that.

some interesting, moving, or funny things I found today. I obviously am using my days off to break a record in reading online :)

1. A wonderful advice for all women who struggle with male dominance at work:

Jezabel added a few extras to the citi's list:

1. Women tend to have two X chromosomes — you are not heard.

2. Women menstruate in public — emphasizes your femininity and deemphasizes your capability.

3. Women sit vaginally — the power position when seated at a table is to have a penis.

4. Wear panties in meetings — boxer-wearers are seen as more assertive and knowledgeable than those in lacy underthings.

5. Women have wombs — children come out of wombs. Men don't reproduce, they conquer.

6. Ovulate — women ovulate at the smallest provocation which erodes your self-confidence. Men tend to move into sperm producing mode.

7. Women tend to smile inappropriately — an "inappropriate" smile is a smile that is on a woman's face.

8. Observe "Rules" — rules are made to be broken by men. When women break them, it is a violation of workplace culture. When women follow them, it is self-sabotage. To be safe, avoid being a woman whenever possible.

9. Being invisible — 90% of adult humans are unable to visually perceive women. Solution: wear a bear suit.

10. Offer a female handshake — the best way to combat this is to have a man's hand transplanted onto your wrist. Or purchase a giant foam hand at a sports stadium. These are very masculine and you are sure to be taken extremely seriously while wearing one.

2. Here you can see a seriously well done example of "If Facebook existed long time ago".

3. Great, simple and well done explanation of changes in health reform:

4. Another great idea to spread awareness - this time it's social education. From social images - using the style of historic site sign, the authors make strong messages about social injustice.

5. Disproportional poverty levels among minorities. Read full article at change.org "poverty in America".

"nearly 26 percent of blacks and just over 25 percent of Hispanics were poor in 2009. Only about 9.4 percent of white Americans were poor during that same period of time. To be fair, gargantuan gaps between white, black and Hispanic poverty rates (and income levels (pdf)) aren't new. They just got worse — much worse — in 2009.

The reasons are complex and interrelated. They rage from the quality of schools and teachers that serve the nation's low-income kids to, yes, poor personal decisions. But they are also the direct legacy of decades of discriminatory policies and practices affecting everything from the way housing is sold to the way banking is done and other wealth and poverty drivers far too numerous to name. And it's not just a question of what's happened in the past. Poverty disparities are very much a function of what is still happening right now."

This is really a shame. The fact that the richest country in the world has such high levels of poverty is a disgrace. I am coming from a pretty poor country, but everyone could go to a hospital, get medicines with big cuts, single mothers get help, and there is paid maternity leave. I knew people who couldn't afford buying new clothes (ok, almost all of us throughout the years... even now I can't buy new clothes, old habit...), but never hungry.

I just can't get it. How come it is ok to kill and spend obscene amount of money on war, but it is morally wrong to "give away"? Why "tough love" is somehow seen as the ideal? Does it really matter if the single mother is "spoiled" by getting enough money from the government that when combined with her salary (which is what? 67% of what she should be getting if she is a woman of color?) she could have a decent life for herself and her children? Is it really so bad? Why so many people who work hard can't afford health care? How come the income of the top percents of richest Americans multiplied may times, while the minimum wage actually dropped? No one on minimum wage is able to lead modest, but decent life. It's just impossible. The myth that the poor are all lazy, drunkards and have no will power is just such a lie.

How difficult would it be to cut off some from the military spending and build more schools? Hire more teachers so there would be no more than 10-15kids in a class, so each would have individual attention? Why not invest in parks, play fields and after school programs so the kids would have choices and enrichment programs instead of hanging out on the streets where troubles can easy find them? Why not fund hobby-clubs, homework support, support for the very talented and the struggling ones. Education could help millions of kids getting better future. But it just happens that the rich and white middle class who make the majority of people with power, have their kids in good private schools or nice suburban public schools, with tennis classes and private tutors. They talk the most about "everyone has the same chance, everyone can go to university" or whatever other crap. such a bs.

Here is another image that shows the discrepancies in income depending on ethnic background (from family inequality):